Caralee’s World
By Caralee Milbourn caralee’s everything has hazel eyes and a warm smile he speaks with a soft voice never raising it his tight embrace doesn’t leave my side his hands grip mine our fingers are intertwined we listen to each breath rise and fall
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Father Who
Caralee Milbourn Dad who runs away and blames it on everyone else who is syringes and burnt spoons who is a cigarette and a BIC lighter whose forehead wears a scowl who tells me I am his own who tells me he loves me whose mind is doped up won’t ever be my dad again spends time with them every single second like they’re better who used to read me stories every single night is gone is a pill found under the table is constantly chasing a high won’t ever admit he was wrong is blaming everything on my mother he spreads his forest fire of lies is jeans with dirty knees and baggy t-shirts who seems to leave more than he comes back guilt tripping me into saying I love you who doesn’t love me I HATE NOT BEING WITH YOU
YOU ARE SO FAR AWAY I DID NOT SLEEP AT ALL LAST NIGHT MY HEART ACHED AS I LONGED FOR YOU I GOT OUT OF BED WITH SWOLLEN EYES AND MY THROAT BURNED THIS IS EVERY NIGHT STILL I HATE NOT BEING WITH YOU IT'LL HAPPEN AGAIN TONIGHT I MIGHT SLEEP A LITTLE I WILL WAKE IN TERROR TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE AS I REALIZE YOU ARE NOT HERE TO COMFORT ME I HATE NOT BEING WITH YOU YOU ARE SO FAR AWAY I Am Afraid
I am afraid but I will not show that I am scared I tremble beneath you but I hold my ground for now you don't harm my body but you aim for my mind --Caralee |
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December 2019
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